Letter to Yuri Aragão
translated from original by Marcelo Dunlop
my child, we don’t know each other personally just yet, but my good friend Gustavo, our renowned father, your father, has already told us of your arrival, he has always been rich with details. I even heard you didn’t even cry when you came into this world, limiting yourself to only telling your father after leaving the doctor’s arms: “Give this good man a tip, ok?” But I didn’t really believe it.
We are certain that here you will not be as comfortable as the place your spent your last nine months, but at least you have more room. So, for you to better understand what you will see and experience in the coming years, I will lay out a succinct guide below, or way to make use, to this curious and messy place you have just arrived at. I am speaking of the magazine’s newsroom, of course.
Make yourself at home. This is your house.
- Uncle Quintanilha doesn’t bite, especially if you keep to a safe distance of 3 meters from him.
- Despite his being a potential luxury lazy chair, Uncle Ivan has a knack for breaking everything he touches. Keep to a respectful distance. As with Uncle Quinta, he usually has crackers. Don’t let him take yours.
- Talking about respect, before stretching out casually on the lap of Uncle Pit, ask him who Malu Mader was. Maiu Madi? That’s right, almost.
- Listen to everything Victor offers. If it is something to eat, chew or seems like a tasty morsel, refuse politely.
- Those loaves of bread over in the corner are Uncle Pedro’s, ai, ai, ai!
- To many at the magazine, there are few things worse than a son that does not cheer for the father’s team. That is why, bro, you are unfortunately being groomed to cheer for botafogo. You will get used to it. Cheering for Botafogo is tough, but worth it. If you don’t yet know anything about your team, it’s easy: your fellow fans are warriors and in love, always sit at the left side of the Maracana, and your team colors are red and black. Often the team is called the curious name of “Flamengo,” or “Mengao.”
- Don’t watch any TV program Uncle Pit tunes in to. Only if it is about Malu Mader, or Flamen… I mean,”Botafogo”.
Uncle Luca lives kinda far away, but he runs the show around here.
May you be the first normal person inducted into this blessed workplace.
Much love,
Uncle Marcelo
